Call Clooney!

97 Brain Damage (2009-05-14)

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0:00:34Daily Source Code ACC’s “mistress on the side”
0:01:22Obama’s commencement speech at party school Arizona State, “big three” topics, TotUS Teleprompter of the US setup, Obama leering at cute black student; ACC on Rose Garden press conference interruption by Pelosi for “biggest public blowjob I’ve ever seen in my life”
0:07:16ACC on “shoeshine Joe” in San Francisco pointing out six-year-olds in strollers
0:10:42Producer note from pharmacist “selling Tamiflu by the boatload”, soon-to-expire lots, allergy season; disease outbreaks and Chinese chicken-horse-pig zodiac cycle; no fevers in some Mexico deaths, JCD on marketing strategies vs conspiracies, generic Tamiflu on the horizon
0:19:13House Judiciary Committee approves new fee on music played by radio stations; Gilead-Roche patent deal terminated in 2005
0:22:42And Now Back to Real News: Eurovision Song Contest preliminary round, funny Terry Wogan commentary in UK; Twitter causes “severe brain damage”; Clean Water Restoration Act and human body ownership by government; PBS Behind Closed Doors documentary, Frontline on Bernie Madoff
0:33:06Homeowner Hope bailout program, 50 out of 51 loans under investigation, sketchy Lend America outfit; Taliban taking over Pakistan, President Asif Ali Zardari on creation of Taliban by CIA and ISI; Gen. David McKiernan relieved of duty and replaced by Stanley McChrystal
0:41:39Five killed at Baghdad stress clinic by US soldier during Pelosi visit; Roxana Saberi released by Iran; JCD: “Pelosi’s like becoming the second government”; Democrats claiming the CIA is after them; Maurice Jarre Wikipedia quote hoax
0:53:57And Now Back to Real News: woman dies using a jackhammer as sex toy, Katie Price & Peter Andre split, UK “too much bling? – give us a ring” campaign, JCD: “this has gotta be an April Fool’s joke”, Cubans ratting each other out, JCD: “an armband and a jockstrap”
0:59:21Mexican drug decriminalization, 2006 bill vetoed due to pressure from US, Portuguese decriminalization success; ACC on Mena AR, CVC’s friend’s parents in the ecstasy business, JCD on Las Vegas casinos and money laundering, Afghanistan opiate near-monopoly, GOD “gold, oil, and drugs”; producer note on Stepan Company in Rumsfeld’s neck of the woods the only licensed importer of coca leaves, ACC on Burmese hill tribe opium dens
1:11:34Twitter feature subtraction sure to be unpopular with user base; JCD recommends Park XO cognac; Judicial Watch bank bailout FOIAs, forced contract signings
1:19:01Donation Segment, ACC “smokin’ hot librarians” ringtone, “John, John, 90% of what you say is ringtone-worthy, my friend”, $17.01 Star Trek “tail number”, Knight “layaway program”